Previvor Mental Health
As a therapist, it baffles me that so few mental health professionals are talking about the unique challenges previvors face. Many aspects of being a previvor are unseen by others and can leave previvors feeling anxious, alone, overwhelmed or isolated. Unsurprisingly, when I tell people I specialize in working with previvors and those with hereditary cancer, one of the most common questions I get is how to deal with all the feelings that come along with knowing you are at high risk. While I don’t think anything is one-size-fits-all, I want to share 4 general suggestions that can be personalized to each individual previvor.
- First and foremost, your anxiety is valid! (Yes, this is for everyone.) You have been told you are at increased risk and that has an impact. I want to validate the fear and anxiety that comes along with this knowledge. You are not crazy because of how you feel; the situation is crazy. As Viktor Frankl said, “An abnormal response to an abnormal situation is a normal response.” You are reacting to an abnormal situation in the best way you can—remember that!
- Remind yourself of the strengths and resources you usually lean on. Everyone has been through difficult times, what helped you then? Use that as a starting point for what to do. Some people like to be distracted and others talk about something ad nauseam and everything in between.You can talk to a friend, listen to music, exercise, take walks, or engage in some form of creative expression (e.g., painting or coloring). Figure out what feels best for you and remember to go back to that.
- Be gentle with yourself! Again, remember that what you are feeling makes sense even if others don’t understand it. Also as you start going through testing, decision making, surgeries, and treatments, you may start to have some limitations—especially physical limitations. If your go-to for anxiety is something you cannot do at the moment, how can you modify it? And when you do, you will also probably be even more frustrated. So be kind to yourself throughout all the difficult and complex stages of your journey.
- Community is invaluable. When you are going through something and you feel alone, that only intensifies the feelings. But when someone else can say “me too”, it makes all the difference. There are wonderful communities of previvors and individuals with hereditary cancer that are warm and welcoming. Sharsheret is one of those communities! You may want individual support or to be part of a larger group. Sharsheret social workers can pair you up with a peer mentor, a Sharsheret Link! If you don’t feel ready to talk, reading someone else’s story, memoir, blog post, or personal reflection can help as well. You may also benefit from pursuing individual therapy so that you have a safe place to talk about everything that is coming up. The most important thing to note is that you don’t have to do it alone!
Sharsheret is here for you in the Waiting Room as you face your fear of the unknown—whether it’s for screening results or your next scan. Click here to visit Sharsheret’s Waiting Room, where you’ll find resources and support for the road ahead.
With generous support from an anonymous donor 
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